It's been a while!

So its been a while since I have written.

I have notice that life catches me by surprise a lot.

I have had a lot of changes, they all lead me closer to God!

God is constantly reminding me of who I am and I what I can do.

When I think I can't go God tells me I got you walk with me.
When I think that I am going to give up, God says give it to me.
When I think I can't take any more, God says don't,  let me take it.

So often I find myself trying to take the lead, only to find myself in another mess.
I am learning to trust God day by day.

He is my secret weapon, he leads and guides me, he is the reason I can be happy in the midst of the trial, or peaceful in the mist of the turmoil. He sees my tears, and pain, and he loves me.

So when the chaos of this worlds gets to you, take a step back and let God lead the way!
He is a much better driver.

God Is Good!

Time to breathe!

Ok this is the first time in a month that I have had time to breathe. I have been through a lot of ups and downs. God has been there with me all the time. Urging me on when I thought I could not go on, holding my hand when I thought no one was there, and holding me when I cried. He never left me. For a while I was carrying this heavy load. God helped me though to see that he could make that load light. He is so good to me!

I have been missing James terribly. I hang onto every letter, to every word. I was so glad he called on the 5th, I can not wait to hear form him again. He has always help me to stay focused on God, now I am having to do that myself. I miss his dry sense of humor too. He is starting to bring that into his letters now. I am counting down the days to his return. Its hard to leave him in Gods hands.

Jess is slipping away from me. I can't seem to bring her back. We are always at each others throats. hard to keep the peace and still be mom. I am giving her to God to! I am praying he will help me be the mother she needs. I love her and I want her to have all that God has to offer, I hope she realizes how much she needs him.

I am feeling very Blessed right now. I guess you could say I am up on the mountain waiting to go down into the valley. Its great up on the mountain, but it is down in the valley where we grow.

Robert's birthday was yesterday. We went out to eat, Jess paid for half, the dinner was enjoyable. We are going to take Robert to Chuckie Cheeses for his Birthday on Friday. he can not wait. He is such a character. he says the cutest things, and he acts like he is grown.

David is doing better, I am trying to work with him on not pitching a fit when he does not get his way, we are getting there.

Well guess I better go. I just mailed James another letter. Have fun today and hug someone you love!

Quite for a while!

Well the office is very quite today! I have still been busy, but just getting work done for the fireworks stand. I like it when I can work undisturbed. 

Things are going relatively well for now. I am hoping to relax a little tomorrow. I am not on the schedule to work any where so I can rest a little. I will probably end up at the fireworks stand.

I am waiting for the chaos to break loose!

Well guess I better go for now!

Busy, is there any other way to be!

Oh my I have been busy lately. I have only had a few minutes to miss James.

By the way I have a post card from James. No return address yet, but I am patiently waiting.

Been extra busy with fireworks and friends. I worked Saturday morning, Baby shower Saturday afternoon, and then worked a few more hours, then had supper and watched a movie with friends. It was a good day. Ended up at work on Sunday too. Long story. Seems like I will be working late tonight too. Every time I clear my desk here, it just gets more cluttered. Its ok,  it is good to busy every now and then.

Well better go, work is calling. Have fun in the sun, but don't get sun burn.

James going away party!

The party was a blast. All of James friends showed up. We had hot dogs and hamburgers. I forgot to make the cookies, LOL! We ran out of plastic cups, and then drinking glasses LOL, but we had fun. James and friends played bat mitten, Soccer, Frisbee, and jumped on the trampoline. The adults rambled around and did some of the same. We mostly stayed inside. Check out my facebook page for all the photos. 

I can not believe my baby is leaving me for 9 weeks. I think I will cry when I drop him off tomorrow. 

God has really been working in my life. Church was great yesterday. We learned about fish. It was a great sermon.  Christians were compared to different types of fish. Don't know if I can remember them all, some where good, and some where not. Maybe later I will list them all in a post. I was so happy and blessed yesterday. I still am today.

Jessica and James will be at the mall today, James is spending time with friends. I know he will miss them when he leaves.

We are planning to take a trip to Disney World in August. The Lord willing, it will work out. Jess is not going, because she has been already and James will not be back yet, so just me, Skip, mom and the boys. What fun.

Well better get some work done. God Bless Everyone!

Last Day of School, and the Official start of Fireworks Season

Well today is the last day of school. No more getting the kids up at the crack of dawn. No more teachers calling, homework not done, lunches forgotten, and James taxi service has come to and end, I think!

I now get to look forward to bored kids, late nights up with the kids, and a mess to clean up when the kids have been home all day!

Well fireworks Season officially begins in June, of course I had to get started in May. I have Saturday off to have James shipping out party. Can't believe he leaves on June 9th. I hope he likes it there. I am expecting to get busier with fireworks after that.

Still taking it one day a time with God! I am reading my bible at night, I have been reading in the book of James it is a good book. I am praying more, trying to complain less. and trying to hold my temper. That is really hard. Just seem to blow up at everything. I am catching myself a lot quicker now.

Well need to get some work done! Encourage someone today and tell them that God loves them.

Make Memories, Live in the Moment

One day at a time brings new meaning to me!

I am learning that I can follow God and do his will if I take it one day at a time, actually, I am taking it one hour at a time lol. Have to keep reminding myself to ask is this what God wants me to do.

We had revival at Church this weekend, it was great. I really enjoyed it.

We also went to the museum! It was really fun! The kids had a blast. Everyone enjoyed it.

Can't wait for our next trip.

Watching Diners, Drive Ins and Dives with Robert. Have a great night.

Where can we go? What can we do?

Where can we go, what can we do?

Our lives are so empty, there is nothing new.

We are living with out God, our prayers are to few.

We struggle each day, just to find a way.

He's right there in our path, just waiting to say.

Come to me I will show you the way.

Where can we go, what can we do?

Ask God for the answer, He is the 

one to go to, He will tell us what to do.

God is there waiting, He is waiting for you!

Just one of my poems. Enjoy!

Plans

Its amazing how we make so many plans that does not include God, then we get upset when they never come to pass.

I was talking to my mom tonight, and we have been trying to make plans to go to Disney World over the summer, It would just be me, Skip, David and my mom. Robert, will be going with someone else, and Jess has already been there, and of course James will be at basic. I told my mom I am not making any more plans unless God is in it. It never works unless he is there.

I think that is my biggest issue. I like to be in control. I am praying to let God lead more and I am leading less. eventually I hope that I can let God just completely take over. That complete surrender kind of scares me. I am not sure why. I know that God is in control, and he only wants what is best for me, but for some reason, I keep holding back. I often wonder is it my pride or what? I am praying that God will show me.

I have been working a lot lately, so I have not been to the gym in a while. I am hoping to get back soon. I may have to wait until after fireworks season. I am pacing myself with work this year, trying to take some time so I don't get burned out. We will see how it goes.

Well it is late and the kids are in bed, time to spend some time with hubby and get some sleep.

Prayer Changes Things

Well today things are much better. All is kind of quite on the home front. Just the normal noise of a 6 person family.

Mom cooked dinner for us today, it sure was good. We had Fried pork chops, french fries and corn. All that starchy good stuff. It was great. I will have to work out some tonight after that.

James is vanless for a few days. The break pads had to be replaced and we have been held up due to rain. His Nanny will be taking him to school and picking him up. Bree she did say she could take you and Brooke home.

Skip is resting before we have to head back to church. James is listening to music while playing on the computer. Jess is visiting with Dylan and his family. She will be back later tonight.

Delaine, my cousin went to Charleston this past weekend. They brought me Shrimp and Grits from Hymans, my favorite place to eat when I am there. She also brought me back a little gift. I love going to the market place and getting some White chocolate. It is great.

Wishing I had the day off tomorrow, but no holiday for us! We all have work and school. Will just have to make the best of the day. We are having revival at church next weekend. I am looking forward to that.

Well guess I better go get everyone moving to get ready for church! Have a good one!

Battle Fatigue

Home is a battle field and we are all watching out on backs. Not going to air to much dirty laundry, so I will keep this light.

Tomorrow is church, I can not wait. I have been debating about going in to work. Home would be good, but not safe, I could always stay in my room.

Never knew being a mother would be so hard. I am praying for guidance.

Gearing up for another work week. Only working six days this week.

Well thats all for now!

All work makes me a dull person!

Trying to find a way to spread all this work around. Two jobs is one to many. The office is easy, and fireworks can be, but combined its a lot of hours.

I have to put in 40 hours a week at the office, and now that its fireworks season, I need to use all my spare time there. Use to not bother me. I loved the money coming in and fireworks can be fun. But lately just seem tired all the time. I asked mom if she could cover half of my shift Saturday, I usually work 10 - 9, so i could get some extra sleep. Of course I am already feeling guilty about it and I am considering going in on my day off on Sunday for a few hours. That is not what I need to do!

On the good side, I am spending time with Skip tonight. Not sure what we are doing, but whatever it is I am sure it will be fun.

Last night I invited James to go out to eat with me at Ruby Tuesdays, I had a coupon for a buy one get one free meal. So I am thinking what a good way to spend time with my son before he ships off to basic. Well James had another idea, before I knew it he had 5 friends going, of course he asked and I could have said no, but I am such a sap! So we had dinner with several of James friends. It was nice.

Jess has plans to go help Dylan's Aunt move tonight, she wanted to spend the night and I said no, but I offer to let her go over for a while. It was my way of compromising. I feel like the evil mom a lot lately.

David is doing better, he finally got a sticker one day! He was good for a whole day! WOO HOO! Of course next day we got into trouble, but hey it was only a short note not two paragraphs long. He is riding the bus again and the bus rider says he is doing better. Meds must be working some.

I want to take the kids to the museum. I have free tickets but they expire at the end of this month. I am hoping to find some time to take them. I would like to make it a family thing, but it is hard to get all of us together.

The office is quite today, but I forgot my book to read, which is why this is a lengthy blog today.

Well just a couple weeks before James leaves for basic. I am arranging to have the 9th off so I can drive him to Greenwood, then on the 10th he is off to Fort Jackson. I know he is ready to go. tensions are growing at the house. We are all to strong willed there.

Well better go see if I can find some work to do. Tell someone you love them, and hug a friend today!

To Change or not to change?

That is the question. The answer is change is good if it is what God wants you to do!

I am making a change in my life. I am trying to look at all the blessings, and not at all the problems.

Can't believe that James will be leaving for basic on June 10th. That is so close. OMG I am going to miss him. There will be no on to do my running around LOL! I love ya James!

David is doing better! I am praying that today is a good day in school.

I can not believe that there is only 2 1/2 weeks left of school! I know the kids are glad.

Fireworks season is upon us. I have already started my seven day work week.

I missed the gym most of last week, I need to get back! I have gained weight! Aghhhhhhh. OK that might have something to do with the bag of candy I bought last week, which by the way is now gone.

Church was good. I missed some of Sunday morning, but on Sunday night we got to share scriptures that help us through life. There was a lot of good ones read. Skip really surprised me with his. He is is full of surprises. Love Ya Honey Bunches!

Well guess I need to get back to work. Hug a friend, and encourage someone that is down today!

Masked Faces. Masked Feelings!

Ok Bree, I wrote this for you.

I saw you smile today, I saw the look on your face.
But what I really saw in your eyes, is what you did not want to face.
You wear a mask and wear it well, why is it you true feelings you never tell.
I am waiting for the truth, waiting for you to see,
to know that I am here, no matter what the problem may be.
God put us together, so we can both feel free,
to have someone to talk to,whenever a need we see.
Come lay your head on my shoulder, cry a river of tears.
Let me be a comfort for you, and help you with your fears.
Wear your mask for others, but remember when you are with me,
its your real face and feelings that I long to see.

Love So Amazing

It is wonderful how when you let God handle the situation, how much better it turns out!

Hoping to go to the gym today! I am ready to work out. Trying to add some good foods to my diet. I just started eating salads lately. I only use a little lettuce, but its a start. I bought some Bananas recently, and I am going to try to start eating them, my body really needs the potassium.

I am having Chili today for lunch, a friends treat! I am so Blessed!

David starting taking medicine to help him sleep! He woke up so much easier today! He was kind of out of it though. Hope that gets better. I am praying that he has a good day at school today. They have not called me yet, that is good.

Jess went back to school today. Hope she is feeling better. The doctor wanted her to go back today, he told her she would have ups and downs until she is better, unfortunately there is really no medicine she can take, she just has to stick it out. I am praying for her! She is not happy about not being able to play soccer though.

Poor James is stuck with the kids again tonight. Maybe he will get a break one day!

Well better go, lunch was great! Hug a friend today and tell someone you love them!

Jesus Take The Wheel

A wise girl once said move over to the passenger seat and let Jesus drive for a while!

I think I will.

Jess has been out of school sick for two days. She goes back to the doctor Wednesday. Hoping she will be back in school soon.

My temper keeps trying to best me, I am going to keep giving it to God. Sometimes I speak before I pray though.

I am hopefully going to the gym today. I love to work out, such a stress reliever. Eric has me doing weights. I think he is trying to hurt me LOL. Naww he just loves me and I told him I needed to get strong enough to beat him in a match of arm wrestling. Never happen lol!

Had to cancel our trip to the museum, and six flags, seems its not suppose to happen just yet, Gods driving I will get there when he is ready. If he wants me to go.

Happiness is a choice, what are you choosing today!

Ok I am trying this out. Blogging from my phone. Ready to get off work so I can work some more.

Taking Time To Breathe

OK, its been a while since I blog, just to busy or to tired. My kids are so stressing me out lately! They are keeping me praying, now that I am doing that again (don't ask).



David, my wonderful 5 year old has gotten in school suspension, and kicked off of the school bus. I think something happened that has him out of control, and I am fining it hard to get him back in line! Been showing him extra love and a lot of supervision. Trying to teach him that things will not always go his way, and how to deal with his anger issues in a good way! Keep praying.



Robert, well as usual he is just being Robert. Actually hes my good child right now.



Jessica, well do not get me started. I dread what she will ask next. I feel like she is using my house for a date place for all her friends and that is going to stop. From now on girls only or boys only. That is all I can handle. Not to mention all the deception that goes on, I know she is a good girl, just wish she would hang around with different folks that what she is now. I knew this dating thing would be a bad idea and get out of hand, and it has. I should have stood my ground, but I seem to be giving in a lot lately.

James, well he has always been a very good child, but lately he has began to act more like Jessica. he figures if he does not tell me, I will not say no, so he just does it anyway and just accepts the consequences. James that is the same as being disobedient, I hate it for ya!

I love all my children, they just drive me to God, maybe that is a good thing! Told the Pastor I would try to stop saying drive me crazy, so driving me to God sounds much better.

Well my husband, he is just my husband, I am learning to love him just the way he is, I am hoping he can do the same for me. We are who we are, and only God can change us! If you are reading this baby, I love Ya!

God still doing a work in me! I don't tell many people this, but I believe that God has a certain direction he wants me to go in life, I am not good at following the directions though, and sometimes I veer off the course. God is faithful to keep returning me to the right course. I know the way is straight and narrow, maybe someday I will learn to drive straight and quit zig zaggin through life.

Well gotta go I am expectantly waiting for the good things that God has in store for me. Are you?

Life Goes On!

So today has been a pretty quite day! James just called with a headache wanting to go home, that means clinic tonight so James absence will be excused. Robert is doing well in school, David is having issues. He is not getting along with the other kids and does not want to wake up from his nap. I have talked with him about this, maybe it will help. He was punished last night also.

Jessica is now wanting to leave school early, since James did, told her she had to wait till at least 2:30.

I am still loosing weight. It is an up and down process. Just have to keep working at it.

My cousin and Aunt joined the gym. That makes me happy. A friend of mine named Chalissa joined too. Her and her husband go in the morning though.

I am planning a trip to the state museum with the kids May 23. I have 4 free passes. It should be fun.

On May 30, I am suppose to take James and a few of his friends to six flags. I think that could be fun. I hope it works out.

I have a dentist appointment on April 30, I will see how well I have been cleaning my teeth.

Well have a great day, hug someone and make a friend laugh today!

TRUST

Ok, that is a serious issue with me right now. I want say to much here, but I will say that I am having a hard time trusting any one.

The trip to six flags was a bust due to the incomptence of school officials. James was upset and that upset me more than any thing. I could not believe how rude the principal of Fox Creek was when I went to him about the whole issue. Maybe he had a rough day or something, I don't know, but that really bother me. He is over my school my kids are in. Theres another trust issue again.

I need to get back to where I need to be with God, this is my main issue now. I don't think I trust myself enough to do the things he wants me to do. For the first time today, I did not look forward to Church. We had to leave half way through because Skip had to go to work. can't decide weather I am happy about that or not. I don't know if I can give God what he wants, control. It scares me to death to let go of it!

So does that mean that I don't trust God enough?

Still seeking, still praying, still looking, still trying!